Beating the blues: staying inspired

Why is it when I reach a comfortable point in life, mental health raises its ugly head? I’ve been lethargic, unmotivated and feeling lazy recently – feelings I loathe.

We recently had an upheaval at home by having our staircase replaced. My parents were typically away for the crucial weekend where we could have been kicked out of the house. The impact would hit me. I wasn’t proud of how I reacted: anxiety went through the roof and I fell apart.

But even after that episode, I wasn’t in a great place. I came from work and sat on my bed, literally doing nothing, staring into space. I’m not sure if it was anxiety, depression or a combination of the two. I hated it.

Lately, I’ve been much better. It started with a conversation with another blogger (you know who you are, and thank you so much), who let me just rant (trying to talk MH to someone not affected just makes me worse – I feel so stupid, despite how much it was affecting my quality of life).

Through pure chance, I also was speaking to a friend about it on the same day, who was aiming for positive thinking.

I took her advice: each morning, when I woke up, I told myself that I got this and it was going to be a good day. If, by the time I got home, that was slipping, I started telling myself “don’t let it win”. Four little words, one big impact.

My first week was a good one, but I slipped on the Saturday. I was feeling lethargic again. I told myself those four little words, then suddenly I was at the gym at 4.30pm, followed by a few errands when I got home. I’ve never turned myself around like that before.

I’m a spiral girl: if I start slipping, I go fast. But it also works in a positive way; if things are going well, I get a real buzz.

At the same time, I cut my phone usage. I was getting addicted to a game, one of those ones where you have to wait a certain amount of time for cures to be made. I must have spent over half an hour a day (during the week, much worse at the weekend) flicking onto it and spending 5/10 minutes at a time playing.

I went cold turkey on it. There was nothing about it that engaged my mind. I would spend the time on it, then come off and feel out of sorts and not bothered to do anything.

The combination of the two things resulted in one of the best weeks I’ve had. I achieved things in the evenings, relaxed properly and I’m sure I slept better as well. I’m trying to take each day as it comes, but knowing that I managed to turn a day around once means I know I can do it again.

What tricks do you use if things are getting out of control?

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